When dealing with ADHD, the subject of impatience inevitably comes up. Those of us with ADHD are like Veruca Salt from the movie Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. That character sings a song in that movie entitled, “I...
EXPLORE RESET ADHD ACADEMY
When dealing with ADHD, the subject of impatience inevitably comes up. Those of us with ADHD are like Veruca Salt from the movie Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. That character sings a song in that movie entitled, “I Want It Now.” Like Veruca, those of us with ADHD want things now. This is especially true when it comes to managing our ADHD. We do not want to wait for improvement to happen slowly. We want to be on top of our ADHD now. However, this is not reasonable. There are no miracle cures or overnight fixes for ADHD. In short, when managing ADHD, we are looking for progress, not perfection.
Managing Expectations
When beginning with a coaching client, I try to remember to tell them that coaching is not an overnight fix. It will take time. I do this, so they are not caught off guard when they realize coaching is not magic. I manage their expectations and model for them how to set expectations. By letting them know that things will take time, I show them how to set expectations for others. That is an important aspect of managing ADHD, managing expectations.
Take the Pressure Off
Once we have set reasonable expectations, we then can enter into ADHD management with the pressure off. If we set our expectations for rapid improvement, we set our selves up for disappointment. By rationally approaching our ADHD management, we find the patience to put in the work of experimentation that managing ADHD necessitates. We can seek progress, not perfection.
Small Gains
I played baseball for two summers growing up. One thing I’ll never forget about my baseball coach is his catch phrase, “Base hits win ball games.” He told us this, so we wouldn’t be aiming for home runs every time we swung the bat. If each batter focused on just getting to first base, we would eventually get runs. Those who swing for the fences every time, strike out a lot. Baseball games are rarely won on home runs. More often than not, it is the slow consistent attack that wins the game. I think this applies to other sports as well. Hockey games are not won by scoring goals every time you touch the puck. You need to make the right passes. You need to get the puck in deep and to the net. Scoring happens more often in the “dirty areas” than in highlight reel goals. Football, as they say, is a game of inches. You don’t need to score every play. A gain of three yards every down will help you march down the field and score the touchdown. I can bring other sports, but I think you get the idea. By making consistent, incremental gains major progress is achieved. So, when looking at your ADHD management, look for those small gains.
Climbing the ADHD Mountain
As you make your incremental gains on the ADHD mountain, look back down at how far you have come every once in a while. Also, look ahead on occasion and see how far you have to go. Knowing when to look what direction is tricky, but a good ADHD management plan does both.
