EP review – Cody-James Henderson And on the 7th day, TISM would die. But like all things that maybe
EP review – Cody-James Henderson
And on the 7th day, TISM would die. But like all things that maybe we thought would remain dead forever (if not for the cool stories to be told and the eagerness to dig up the dead that some people have had) TISM have risen once again!
From the slumbers of ‘Osteoarthritis’ & the manifests of political nightmares, the obscurest-masked nihilistic outfit have donned the balaclavas for the first time since their unexpected reunion tour for the Good Things Festival in 2022 to bring us new music for the first time in nearly 2 decades! And now with all your favourite members! Ron, Humphrey, Eugene, Jock have brought new masked man ‘Vladimir’ into the record world and not without everyone’s favourite backing group ‘Jon St Peenis & The Les Misérables dancers’ (It’s not quite Herb Alpert & The Tijuana Brass, but Australia’s equivalent will just have to do).
TISM??? Christmas Number 1??? It was a story destined to happen that even Nostradamus himself wouldn’t believe it even if it hit him clear in dead skull. The band has brought us The “C” Word as an early Christmas gift, (following their latest single ‘I’ve Gone Hillsong’ & ‘Schopenhauser’s SUV’ just weeks ago) but don’t be fooled. The “C” word TISM are talking about isn’t ‘Christmas’, nor is it ‘Comeback’ or even ‘Contemporaneous’ (I don’t know what that means but it just sounds cool doesn’t it?) but I think you’ll get a good idea of TISM’s favourite ‘C’ Word the second you start this release.
That’s right. Its C*nt. And if that offends you, its best to stay away from this EP (And TISM all together) But if you’re a connoisseur of the Aus-English language, you’re going to love this.
Whilst ‘C*nts v *C*nts’ starts with melodic piano introduction and before the few of you start to believe that TISM have sold out (Put your balaclava back on Greg, its okay) the low disco hum starts to make its way into the fold before that all familiar voice comes rushing over you that that sweaty uncle at your family gatherings. It may have been a while, but you never forget it. And its oddly warm for some reason? Thematically, it reminds me of the ‘Whatareya’ battles of the late 90s. Only this time its ‘C*nts & Pricks’ and not ‘yobs and w*nkers’ but is there really any difference?
The lyrical fantasy of vocalist ‘Humphrey B Flaubert’ and undeniable harmonies of ‘Ron Hitler-Barassi’ is accompanied by the trademark disco influenced beats TISM are known for. It feels like a B-Side you’ve never heard after all this time but possesses a new charm in the newest chapter of TISM. I wonder if they’ve been listening to ‘Damien Cowells Disco Machine’ for inspiration? (Who he is, is not important. Stop asking.)
Citing some of the most important battles in our modern history as source (Kim vs Kanye, Dickhead vs Cock, Motorist v Cyclist) TISM asks the all-important question; “But who ya gonna go for when you hate both sides?” Never strangers to controversy, the comparison of ‘Hitler v Stalin’ the UK rivalry of ‘Man United & Man City’ will absolutely get a laugh.
But the ‘C’ word doesn’t stop there. As a matter of fact, The Eps self-titled track is a clever tongue in cheek political alliteration of all the C words you could think of. Yes, including C*nt again (You seem surprised by this, you must be new here) And trust me, if you think TISM are very forward with their profanity in English, I really hope you don’t know how to speak Italian.
We finally get to hear the influence of new guitarist ‘Vladimir Lenin McCartney’ on this new track. Filling the void left by James Paul who sadly passed away in 2008 would be no easy task. And whilst anyone can put on a Balaclava, not anyone can be in TISM. But Vlad gives it his damned best. His tone gives such a strong musical backing to even stronger political commentary without being too left in the dust, but not overpowering the rest of the track. The riff work is just as fun and bouncy as the rest of the song around him. Safe to say Vlad has already comfortably fit into his Balaclava and suit (I just hope its not Pauls, because you know, that would be weird)
“Clowns cavort in the courts of command. Our culture climate’s kinda Kardashian.” This is without a doubt already one of my favourite TISM lyrics (and if you know TISM, at least every song has something you can take from it. The bands clever and confident ways of political attacks without being so direct is something that hasn’t been lost in the bands nearly 2 decades absence. No matter how the times have changed, TISM always remains the same.
‘The “C” Word’ is destined to make its way to the top of the all-time classic TISM songs due to its unruly sing-along chorus & high energy that will make you feel like you’re on the substance of another ‘C’ word.
Okay I guess if you’re wanting something a little more serious (I really don’t know what you’re really expecting from a band who is an abbreviation of ‘This is Serious, Mum’) then I guess the 1 minute poetic reading of Ron Barassi on ‘Dr Norman Swan’. Swan who is Scottish Born-Australian Medical Journalist, gets thanked by Ron in this moving piece for being the ‘Calm Patient Tone’ that guided us through a plague. But it still didn’t stop him from taking pot shots at ‘Sky News’ for being buffoons who have the rage of toddlers.
Even in seriousness, there is no escaping TISM if you act like a w*nker.
Rounding out the EP with an even longer version of ‘C*nts v C*nts’ ths time with the opening warning of “Ladies and Gentlemen, TISM are back. And we sincerely apologise” the band dives into even more infamous battles (TISM v TISM is my personal favourite here) and additional verses warning us “You’ll get picketed if you sit on the fence” TISM has shown they are back and taking no bullsh*t.
It’s not Hot Dogma or Machiavelli and the Four Seasons hell its not even Best Off (it counts, fight me) this is The “C” Word. It’s the start of something new for TISM. But most importantly, it’s TISM how we know and love them. Will there be an album to follow suit in the future? Who knows. Right now, let us enjoy the return of our charismatic leaders before the inevitable comet wipes out all trace of man (hopefully before the end of your end of year exams).
Long live TISM.
TISM are shit.
