Being a woman with autism is a paradox. We're often expected to be the social butterflies, the emotional guides, the masters of empathy. Yet, for many of us, these very expectations are like kryptonite to our already-strained bandwidth.
Living in a World Whispering in Morse Code: My Journey as a Woman with Autism
My brain hums. It's a constant electrical current, buzzing with a thousand thoughts at once. Sometimes, the hum is soft, a gentle background music to my day. Other times, it explodes into a cacophony of lights, textures, and emotions, leaving me gasping for sensory air. This is my world, one painted in vibrant hues, amplified sounds, and whispered emotions – a world filtered through the unique lens of autism, as experienced by a woman.
Imagine navigating a social dance where the steps keep changing, the music is an atonal clash, and everyone else seems to have a secret decoder ring for the unspoken rules. That's like trying to connect with people, a constant puzzle of deciphering facial expressions, interpreting silences, and masking my internal symphony. I learned to smile politely, even when my insides were screaming the opera of overstimulation.
Being a woman with autism is a paradox. We're often expected to be the social butterflies, the emotional guides, the masters of empathy. Yet, for many of us, these very expectations are like kryptonite to our already-strained bandwidth. We feel the emotions, sometimes more acutely than others, but expressing them can be like wrestling a wild beast out of its cage. It's not a lack of feeling, it's a struggle for translation.
Then there's the masking. We become chameleons, blending into the background, mimicking social cues we don't naturally understand. It's exhausting, this constant performance, like balancing on a tightrope woven from expectations and anxieties. But we do it because the alternative is often isolation, misunderstanding, and the sting of "You don't seem autistic."
But, oh, the moments of clarity, the times the world aligns with my internal rhythms. It's like stepping into a sunlit clearing after a sensory storm. The colors sing the music hums in harmony, and my thoughts dance in perfect sync. These are the moments that remind me – this is my way of experiencing the world, and it's beautiful, even in its chaos.
Being a woman with autism is not a disease to be cured, but a unique tapestry woven with threads of neurodiversity and strength. It's about learning to embrace the hum of my brain, the symphony of my senses, and the quiet resilience that blooms amidst the noise. It's about finding others who understand the Morse code whispers of our minds and building a world where our neurodiversity is not just accepted but celebrated.
So, listen to the women with autism. We have stories to tell, dreams to chase, and a vibrant world to share. It may be different, but it's no less beautiful. Open your ears, expand your understanding, and join the dance in the symphony of neurodiversity. We'll welcome you with open arms, and maybe even teach you a new tune or two.
There is Hope For You
Knowing you're not alone can be incredibly empowering. An autism diagnosis can connect you to a supportive community of others who share similar experiences and can offer understanding and empathy.
Here at the Thriving Wellness Center, we specialize in working with Women with Autism. We have locations in New York and New Jersey and perform thorough and accurate Adult Autism evaluations and therapy in-person and online. If you are newly diagnosed with Autism or interested in getting a diagnosis in New York, New Jersey, or virtually please contact us to see how we can help you improve your life.
