When people hear that I’m a boudoir photographer, I often get the response “I’ve always wanted to do that!” Sometimes that’s followed by something like “but first I need to lose ten pounds.” This always makes me a little...

When people hear that I’m a boudoir photographer, I often get the response “I’ve always wanted to do that!” Sometimes that’s followed by something like “but first I need to lose ten pounds.” This always makes me a little sad. There’s a subtext in that statement that says the person doesn’t think they’re “good” or “perfect” enough the way they are.

Believe me, I understand about trying to lose those elusive pounds! But there will ALWAYS be something about ourselves that’s not “perfect” or “ideal.” If you’re chasing perfection, it’s a race you’ll never win. As women, we tend to fixate on our perceived flaws. Then even worse, we downplay or ignore all the beautiful things that make us unique. To me, true beauty comes from confidence and self-acceptance. When you’re comfortable with who you are, the need to always compete and compare yourself to others diminishes. It creates a place of true acceptance where kindness and compassion can thrive.

Boudoir Photography is not about perfection. It’s about highlighting your strong points. It’s about looking at yourself from different angles, literally and figuratively. It helps you to focus on all the beautiful things that others see about you, but that you overlook because you’re too busy dissecting your pet flaws (we all have them!). Boudoir photography is about acknowledging that beauty comes in all shapes and sizes and it’s absolutely ok to not to be perfect. It’s about giving yourself permission to be sexy in addition to being a mom, partner, professional, daughter, etc.

Can doing a boudoir shoot get rid of all your insecurities? If only it were that easy. But the confidence it gives you is a great place to start! And years from now, you’ll look back at the pictures and say “can you believe I thought I needed to lose weight?”

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