I was a Christian for quite a while before I really understood that God loves me. Maybe you can relate to that, acceptance of Jesus often starts in some other place. It’s easy to understand that you are selfish and sinful, Jesus offers a way to be forgiven. It’s a wonderful idea to think I can have a relationship with God that will bring an assurance that there’s a plan and purpose for life. Knowing God hears our prayers and takes our worries brings a lot of freedom in life. The Bible is full of practical wisdom and encouragement for every day. I think for me, understanding that God loves me was a leap because I did not love myself very much. I felt there was a call on my life to share the Gospel, care for others and serve but I often felt sad, frustrated and depleted. 

When I was at university, I was talking on the phone about this struggle to a trusted friend. After we explored why I was feeling this way, they told me “God loves you completely right now: nothing you’ve ever done will make Him love you less and nothing you’ll ever do in the future will make Him love you more.” I clearly remember that moment. It was a crisp, clear Spring day and I was sitting in front of the window in my dorm room looking out. The truth dropped into my heart and almost took my breath away. The next thing I thought was that I needed to tell other people this! I quickly and joyfully finished the conversation with my friend and immediately found anyone who would listen and asked “did you even know?!” I’ve heard it said you must give love away to know that you’re lovedi, but the truth of the matter is you must KNOW you are loved, then you have it to give.  

Imagine living next to a fresh mountain stream but thinking the only way to get drinking water was to collect rain. You would be totally dependent on the weather and there might be times when you have to ration because of drought. If you could store the water, you’d have to be vigilant to make sure it didn’t get contaminated. That’s what it was like before I realized the truth of God’s love, I was at the whim of my own emotions. It made me a perfectionist control freak, always thinking about what others thought of me and trying my best to carefully present myself as someone worthy of love. The problem was I couldn’t keep up. I was living with guilt and anxiety over the things I’d done wrong, and my only hope was to perform better in the future.  

You already have access to an unfathomable flow of unconditional love – it’s the greatest love there ever was or will be, and it’s yours: for yourself and to give it away.  God’s love will never run dry. 

1 John 4:7-11: “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.” 

If you are struggling to know you are loved and love the people around you, maybe you need this revelation to drop from your head to your heart too. Take it from me, I know He loves you. But there’s also some things you can do for yourself to discover the fresh flow of God’s love. 

Accept God’s Word 

Romans 8:35 “Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?” 

The answer is no, nothing can separate us from Jesus’ love – go on, take a minute to read the rest of Romans 8. The love of God for you is written all over the Bible. When this truth came alive to me, I took the verses and put my name in. I wrote them down and posted them where I would see them often. I journaled about them and made art about them. Psalm 139 is another Bible passage that you can take for yourself, put your name in and accept it.  

Ask Him to Tell You 

It’s not selfish to ask God in prayer “Do you love me? Could You show me today?” That’s why it’s so good to be a part of church, the place where God can express His love for you through others. The answer is likely to come through His people, but it might also come through His Word. It could also come through a song or a moment in nature. If you do pray that prayer though, your part is to look for and receive the answer.  

Give It Away 

John 13:35 “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”  

It is true that once you have caught the truth of God’s love for you, you will naturally want to give it away. Jesus told us that our love for each other would be a sign to all that we belong to Him. This is a supernatural thing; it’s not a guilt trip. A lack of love is a sign that we need to get back to the source: God. We will come to the end of our own capacity to love, but the love we have to give comes from He who loves us no matter what we ever did or will ever do. Take some time to let that truth wash over you today.