I’ve been thinking a lot lately about why some people keep going through the hard seasons, and others get stuck.

I think it comes down to one thing.

They know their why.

Simon Sinek talks about this, and I think he’s right. When you’re connected to something that really matters to you, you stop needing to feel motivated every day. You just do the work, because it means too much not to.

We don’t always have to go searching for our why.

Sometimes it has been there the whole time, sitting inside the experiences we’d rather forget.

When I look at my own life, I can see it clearly now.

I burned out in my corporate retail years. At the time it floored me. It is also the whole reason Escape Haven exists. I had seen how few places gave women permission to stop, rest and put themselves first, so I built the one I wish I’d had.

I grew up in a very quiet house in the country, singing to the cows and goats because there was no one else around. All I dreamed of was a home full of noise. Our home in Bali is now never quiet, full of children, friends and laughter. I got the life that little girl imagined.

The relationships I grew up around taught me what I didn’t want, and made me clear about what I did. Kindness. Respect. Someone who makes me laugh. I met Trent at 41, and he still does, every single day.